Oct 30

My roommate and I are dead donkey broke- but decided to say a big “Fuck You” to Bush by spending our Economic Stimulus checks on another country.

No… it didn’t go quite like that.

I’d like to think that my All Inclusive Cancun Vacation was a Political Protest- instead it was a wine soaked evening in front of a lap top which ultimately decided the trip. After several grueling hours crumpled in a plane- me and my roommate, Heather- I doubt she’ll mind if I use her name- finally tumbled into the hot and semi overcast wonder of Mexico. Already I could sense the deep stench of couple-dom surround us as we waited for our poor deflated luggage to come hobbling through the baggage return. I noticed the ever present uniform of matching sweats, weary faces, and flattened up do’s- which could only mean one thing: I was in a Honeymoon Vortex. Heather and I had previously joked that this was going to be our “honeymoon”- but I had no clue that there were going to be so many freakn’ newly weds. It was almost as if I had a giant sign that read, “SINGLE” in scarlet  red letters across my chest. On the shuttle to the hotel we met a lovely couple who had to be at least 21. They told us they were from “mAAAAss” which I took to mean Massachusetts . Apparently, they had just got married the night before and boy did it show. The groom was friendly, but stared out the window of the van with the glazed, “I’m in over my head and super hungover” look. The bride’s fake eyelashes clung to dear life as she rubbed the corners of her eyes smearing the last remains of her professionally done make- up. This was the ugly side of marriage and I secretly noted to take a break, at least to wash my face between the wedding and the honeymoon.

The pleasantly deflated love birds were the last friendly couple me and heather encountered the rest of the trip. The hotel was beautiful, but should have been named Jerk Town, because that’s all it seemed to accommodate. Who knew that people who were supposedly in love could be so damn cranky?! From the moment we checked in, to the time we exited the premises we were encased in a bubble of assholes. Which is a shame because the staff was wonderful- by wonderful I mean they said hello and constantly fed me alcohol- which is the way to my heart.

The women of the hotel were from various walks of life, and there must have been a representative from all age groups. Yet there were two uniting factors which made them seem like clones to me; they were all fat and angry. You don’t even know how many ladies I spied rubbing sunscreen on their exposed fleshy parts as they scowled down the waitress when handed their fruity drinks. Needless to say, this made Heather and I (two single ladies) the target of many leers. I’d like to hope that during my honeymoon and/or anniversary, I wouldn’t have to worry about my spouse as much as these ladies where.

Yet, unfortunately they had reason to be so overprotective, because these men… these bloated rolly polly, t-shirt tan, hairy men were pigs. Especially when their angry broads weren’t around.

I’d like to bring your attention to Exhibit B.

Trying to take advantage of the sun, Heather and I decided to sit by the pool. On this particular day, it seemed that the entire hotel thought that this would be a fabulous idea resulting in a shortage of lawn chairs. After fiddling with two broken chairs and circling the pool, we finally decided that moving two empty lawn chairs out of the shade and into the sun would be the best option. I’d like to think that me and Heather are sturdy individuals- but these lawn chairs must have weighted a ton each- so we had to tag team it and move one chair at a time. Reclining next to these chairs were two Grampa black guys who were obviously checking us out. Instead of silently checking us out as they probably would if their collective angry wives where next to them, they choose to revel in their freedom and heckle us as we moved each chair,

“Tryn’ to get some sun, eh… hahahahah… don’t work too hard… hahahaha, try not to hurt yourself hahahha… that one doesn’t like me…”

The “one” being me, obviously since I’m black I should be extra responsive and enjoy being checked out by men who looked like my great uncles. It would have been nice to get some help instead of being mocked by two beached whales… but I was on vacation, so I smiled and continued to move the chairs. Not wanting to move very far, we went about 3 feet  and placed them next to a Yee-Haw white guy in a baseball cap, who once we were done looked up and said,

“Well, I guess I should have told you that these two chairs were empty… they just have some towels on them.” That was annoying. To add insult to injury the two Gramps added,

“Way to tell them about the chairs after they moved the other ones!!!” To which Baseball Cap replied,

“I’m on vacation, meaning my brain’s on vacation,” Then out of nowhere the portly Russian gold chain wearing man who had been silently observing the whole situation decided to add his two cents,

“Well sometimes it’s nice to see women actually working.” They all had a big old laugh, while I sat horrified at the idiocy of these douche bags.

One by one, each of the spouses returned to their chuckling husbands. As each angry lady plopped down, each man stopped chuckling and took on a very pious look- as if they weren’t just apart of a giant sexist bru-haha.

Looking at these pitiful individuals I decided not to make a funk, after all, once I left the premises I would never have to encounter these people ever again. While these Piggy men and Jerk women were attached to each other for however long their unions would last.

I laid back, flashed a smile at the waitress as she handed me my sugary concoction and decided that being single was a very wonderful thing.

Oct 27

Going on vacation there is always the inevitable road block one must encounter in order to get to the desired destination: Air Travel. This horrible montrosity of transportation effects millions of people on a daily basis- but for some reason whenever I board a airplane, I get the sinking feeling that my particular flight will result in some flaming crash either in the ocean (if I’m lucky) or on land. I seek out the pilot and wonder if his ruddy complexion is a due to sun exposure or booze. I also map out my escapes, actually noting where the nearest exit is- and which person would be the easiest to over take when knocking my way towards it.

Through the years, I have developed (I guess you can call them) ticks- kind of like a strange ritual which I believe will keep the plane in the air: I read the safety manual each time (even on connecting flights) and I always have a glass of ginger ale. Why do people drink ginger ale on airplanes? I know that making fun of pictures of ladies clutching the seat cushion while sipping on my old time-y soda will definitely not help the chances of dying in a watery airplane wreckage- but for some inane reason I believe I did my part for the plane’s safety.

Recently, I enjoyed a delightful journey to Mexico- after taking a 5 hour flight to Miami, I found myself wedged in a window seat- deliriously mumbling pleasant thoughts to myself and staring at the wing of the plane. As I waited for this connecting flight to take off from the runway, I watched a rather cranky couple in festive clothing wade to their seats, which happened to be right in front of mine. The woman who’s hair could only be described as a looking like a shellacked sticky bun, proceeded to maneuver her white and green muu muu into to the seat in-front of mine. I couldn’t help but admire the details that went into each carefully pinned and sprayed coil nestled on top of her head. I wanted to touch it- but decided against it considering my current appearance. I don’t dress up to fly, in fact I dress so far down one might mistake me for a homeless stowaway with scabies. I pulled my hood over my flattened hair, and shoved my hands into my pockets. Sticky Bun’s husband came lumbering next- obviously rather upset that he had the middle seat. He stood facing my roommate and I, leaned on the back seat as if he were about to start a jolly conversation with us, but instead said to himself, “This is bullshit.”

“Sit down, Harold.” Sticky Buns moaned.  My roommate and I, not quite knowing what to do- tried to avoid looking at the man facing us. This resulted in looking down- exchanging worried glances- or looking out of the window- which only supplied concrete scenery and the occasional airplane tarmac guy yelling at another airplane tarmac guy. Being that I was on the second leg of my trip, completely sleep deprived, and cranky as all hell- I decided to give up being polite and stare at this man who was basically shoving his bald head into my minimal personal space.

“This is bullshit.” He groaned again while clutching his seat belt extender. His breathing was heavy- sounding like it came from the deepest bowels of his throat. Reaching into the pocket of his tan Member’s Only jacket- he pulled out a tissue and dabbed at the sweat beads that were accumulating on his naked brow and his mustached upper lip.

“Harold. Sit down”

“This is Goddamn Bullshit, and you know it.”

“Harold.”

This went on for quite a while until, Harold finally decided that he couldn’t fly to Mexico standing backwards on his seat decided to sit down. I sighed a heavy sigh and resumed daydreaming about crashing planes. After shifting around in my seat I finally found a semi- alright position with my legs stretched out under Muu Muu’s Chair. Almost immediately, she reclined eliminating all the spare room I had and placing me face to face with the magnificent beauty of her sticky bun hair. I flagged down the stewardess and ordered a ginger ale- because I was almost certain I was going to die on this flight.

Oct 17

Man in cowboy hat and charm bracelet approaches the desk.

Me: Hi, how can I help you?

Man: I want a book on travel to Africa.

Me: Okay, anywhere specific?

Man: Like Zimbabwe and Mozambique. I want to know the culture and the money, and the night life. Does Africa have it’s own currency? Or does it use the Euro?

Me: Africa has a multitude of currency- each country has its own currency.

Man: Well London, doesn’t like using the Euro.

Me: Okay.

Man: Like tourism… are you finding anything?

Me: No, I’m not… see this is an academic library and we have books on African History, but not tourism. You’ll probably have better luck at the public library.

Man: But that’s boring.

Me: Well, no. Academic libraries and Public libraries carry different materials- so you should check the Public library for books by the publisher “Lonely Planet”

Man: But I want to know about African Nightlife and African Dance- Like African Folklore. Is there any books on the computer for African Tourism.

Me: No, sir… You said African Folklore? We have that.

Man: On the computer? Do I just type African Folklore Dot Com?

Me: No… it’s an electronic book you can look at it from the computers here at the library.

Man: Do I just show you my ID. (Shows me his ID)

Me: No. You go to a computer- do a title search.

Man: Title author or title keyword.

Me: No. Title as in Title of the Book.

Man: Oh- then do I put www

Me: No. ( I proceed to explain electronic books slowly, and write out a diagram for him to use- I even demonstrate it for him)

Man: Okay.

Me: You think you got it.

Man: Yes. I’m going to go look at it right now.

Me: Okay great. There’s a computer open, right over there.

Man: Great.

Then he walks out of the Library.

Oct 4

There are various moments in time when you have to take a step back and evaluate the present situation. Usually this is accompanied with the question, “how the fuck did I end up here?!”

I’m not talking about the sticky morning after or a wasted black out… but a situation that happens ever so often when you are bone dry sober and experiencing some of the weirdest shit imaginable. When I first started attending UC Santa Cruz, this would pretty much happen to me almost everyday- until about the middle of my Sophomore year, I got so used to the everyday freak-fest that I wouldn’t even bat an eyelash if I saw some dude in a cat suit riding a unicycle. By the time I was a Senior it wasn’t even weird anymore, but rather just how life was.

Then I returned to the normal world, and got used to normal things once again.

Then last night happened. Open studios… the one night of the month where all the art galleries of Oakland decided to have a giant Loony Parade. Like a scarred war veterning I couldn’t help but have major flashbacks of my time spent deep in the trenches of Artfool glory.

After entering and leaving gallery upon gallery, I found myself shoving past a circle of skinny kids in newspaper skirts and signs that read “peace” and other silly bullshit pasted to their foreheads. If their outfits and glazed expressions weren’t enough to drive me over the edge their chants of nonsense and hare krishna type bells did the trick. Quickly drowning out the newspaper brigade, a make shift band started up. The drummer had affixed an antenna with tinsel to the top of his head which bobbled around as they produced what could only be described as “noise”. I ducked into the nearest gallery and found myself in a dimly lit room packed with slow roving people. Were they roving slowly because of the $3 muddled wine? Could it have been the inflated art talk? Maybe it was because the floor of the entire gallery was covered in about 2 feet of pine needle, sod, and other things you might have found strooling through the redwoods. Taking a deeply resigning sigh- I padded my way towards the “exhibits” of hanging puffy painted capes, and a gigantic yarn God’s Eye- the lamest craft ever.  I noticed that there was a crowd around four tubes that were sticking out of a wall. Some had light emitting from them, while others had noise. I began to make my way towards one of the pipes to “explore” my senses- but was abruptly pushed aside so some spritely lady could take a peek. I felt myself growing angry at her complete disregard to other people- but then at that moment I took a step back.

I, Nnekay, was getting upset because I couldn’t look through a pipe on the wall, while I was standing on two feet of pine needles in a gallery in the middle of downtown Oakland. This situation was so absurd, it forced me to realize a fact that I had been dreading for a very long time.

I have become a jaded adult.

Talking about the political impact a television covered in pine needles has on the community at large-  just didn’t make sense to me anymore. There was once a time, I would have loved to roll around in the art orgy that is Open Studios, but mostly because Mommy and Daddy took care of me, I didn’t have bills, and frankly I had turned a blind eye to many of the crisis’ affecting our nation and others abroad. I’m not saying that I’m now an activist, but it all seemed

So. Incredibly. Phony.

And with that, I discovered I no longer am apart (more like struggling to be) of the “art movement”- just a detached, and slightly annoyed observer. I love art and will always try to surround myself with creativity- but the scene, as with most “scenes” are just filled with inflated egos and chatter that amount to nothing.

I don’t know where this leaves me, but I will not be caught dead seriously contemplating the ramifications of political satire as flashed in black and white through a pipe on the wall.

Oct 2

Sometimes while I sit in the public library I wonder to myself if people with superhuman capabilities truly exist. I mostly wonder this in the public library, because if they did exist- no doubt they would be crazy bum people.

It’s funny- when I read a comic books or watch a movies involving Superheroes, I never question the actually abilites of these happy shiny freaks- nope… I question their sanity. Yes, yes the X-men where shunned from society and many of these heroes lived double lives- but how could you function in your secret identity life if you, say had x-ray vision. Forget being the man of steel, you would need nerves of steel to deal with that daily madness.

If I could read people’s minds I would need a heavy Valium to get through the day. The majority of what is going through the everyday mind is boring, creepy, mean, or whiny- this is why they remain in the head and not said out loud. I wouldn’t want to go through life hearing people bitch about how badly another person is driving.

Gosh no thanks.

This would not be a gift, it would be an affliction- I would probably wear headphones to drown out the lulls of grocery lists and rock back and forth in a corner… and BAM! I’d be written off as a schizo.

Not to mention, another theory of mine, which I have used in previous post- when you’re really good at something (may it be math or whatever) something more basic (like hygiene or social skills) goes out the door. There have been some really brainy superhero types… in real life they would be sooooo socially awkward. That’s why I like Batman so much- he doesn’t even have any superhuman powers, but he’s a total recluse weirdo… except for when he’s Bruce Wayne Billionaire Playboy… I’m gonna ignore that cheesy aspect of the comic along with Robin. 

Some of it makes sense… superheroes in comics do dress weird and some claim to be aliens…

So yes, maybe the next time a crazy bum smiles at you with that knowing twinkle in his eye… who knows he might be able to read your mind. Or he could just be a crazy bum. Just another way to look at the world and make it more magical.